The Marshall Law

The Marshall Law:  If it's whack, send it back.  

Today I'm gonna throw up a bunch of pictures from restaurants i've been to and experienced their order of things to be.  After every picture I will briefly review visuals, tastes, smells, and over all dining experience. 

Most people go to BJ's Diner for the pizza and micro brews.  Me and my family go for the pizookie.  Here I am with my brother and sister in law in Fresno CA.  For those who don't know pizookie is a giant half baked chocolate chip cookie cooked in an individual pan topped with a giant scoop of french vanilla ice cream.  Amazing.  

Here I am found eating somewhere in Switzerland at a Doner Kabab eatery.  Everybody kept hyping up Doner Kabab's like they're God's ticket to paradise.  What a joke.  You can see the look on my face is one of discontent, as was my whole dining experience.  The kabab sucked, it smelled weird in there, the guy preparing the food was picking his nose, and the pita wrap around the meat was dry as was the meat itself.  What really upset me was the watered down, flavorless, yogurt style sauce he put on the damn thing.  Pissed me off.  However i've had other Doner Kabab's since then and they ruled.  

Here I am spotted eating a delicious German Sausage at a sausage/grease truck in Leeds, UK.  The scent wafting through the crowded streets was mouth watering.  The sweet onion sauce was superb and gave me a whole new perspective on German cuisine.  The structure is simple:  Giant brat, bun, and sweet onion chili sauce (on request) along with your favorite condiments and 3 euros.  You would think a sausage this good could only be found in Germany.  

Sorry Spokane IHop.  Not even a friendly, giggling pancake is gonna draw me into your God forsaken pit stop of delinquent breakfast foods.  On the road I usually enjoy IHop cuz it's open 24 hours and easy to find.  And let's be honest, pretty much anything that's open late is acceptable on tour.  This photo was taken 3 blocks from my house while waiting for the bus to go to Hoopfest.  

One thing I look forward to when I'm visiting Cincinnati is Lee's Chicken & Biscuits located just outside the city across the bridge to Kentucky.  It tastes as good as it smells.  Great fried chicken and what's even more amazing is their sweet tea.  So good I buy it by the gallon.  

This is at the carnival in Hamburg Germany last winter.  Take a good look at this picture.  Although attractive to the eye one might notice that these bananas are candied over their peels.  What's the point of candying a banana on the outside of the peel you ask?  The answer is simple.  They're euro's.

The crepe stop across the street from the eiffel tower in Paris France.  One thing the French do correctly is crepes.  Although the smell is remarkable and their taste is legacy, for 5 euros a pop I better be shitting gold coins after that snack.  

Ahh yes, Chicken Wizard located in beautiful Sydney Australia.  The logo of a smiling/winking chicken holding a cepter, wearing a cape and wizards hat is amazing.  The food, not so much.  

When I asked where I could find the best burger in Melbourne Australia everybody said Lord Of The Fries was the spot.  What a scam.  Here is a perfect example and living proof to the pain that a hippy wind can bring.  They only make veggie burgers here damn it!  I'm not that hard to please, but next time I ask for a damn burger you better make sure it's beef.  Don't even get me started about the fry's.  Although the name is rad, I don't recommend this place to any of my friends.  Hippy's, coffee indie dorks, emo's, hipster's, and bike dorks alike: Eat up, this place is for you fruit.  The end.